Wednesday, July 1, 2009

My Kinky Texas Adventure - Part 3

What was it I said at the close of the last post? I promised not to make you wait as long for this next installment as I did the last time?

Wow. Am I in for it. There are reasons for the long delay - believe me, but I won't go into them right now. But if I don't smarten up, Clover will report me to Mistress for breaking that promise. I can't imagine what the result of that could be.

The Jamboree got underway in earnest on Thursday evening. Or at least, it was supposed to. Mistress, Stormy and I had arrived late in the day on Wednesday and spent a couple of days helping out around the place. There wasn't a whole lot to do because people had already been very busy getting ready for the event and most of the work was done. That left the three of us with time to work on our dressage system and get some idea of how things were going to work. We had been given the honor of performing in the opening ceremony on Thursday night, so we wanted things to go well indeed.

Mistress selected some suitable music and arranged a dressage choreography that had Stormy and I working in tandem. It was great fun putting it together and would be very impressive when performed.

Everyone gathered for the opening ceremony in the waning hours of Thursday. Mistress had sequestered Stormy and I in the barn. We were resplendent in out nice clean tack with the flags of the United States and the State of Texas secured to our backs. I had the US flag and Stormy carried the flag of Texas. Both flags were very big and impressive, and they flew behind us as we moved about. Mind you, they didn't fly like that because we were running about. They flew like that because it was very windy. It was also cloudy and damned cold!

I had thought of Texas as a southern state and convinced myself that southern states never got cold. I was in for an awakening and it started that night. Temperatures were in the low 60s. I know that shouldn't be cold to a New Englander like me, but when you are shirtless and wearing saddle leather in a high wind, it bores down to the bone eventually. I recall one Texan, looking at me as I shivered, and saying, "I thought you northerners were used to temperatures like this!" I replied by telling him that northerners like me know to go inside or put on warmer clothes when it gets cold. That's how we manage!

But for the moment, Stormy and I were in the barn awaiting the signal to come rushing out with our flags and wow the crowd. We endured the wind and the dust it blew into our eyes and mouths (we had bits in place, after all) as we looked for the signal.

But the signal did not come. I don't know how long we were there, but the guest of honor was not able to make it to the ranch that night after all, so the opening ceremony was postponed until the following morning.

Not a problem. Just get this flag down out of my harness, take the bit out of my mouth and tell me I have been a good boy.

My first ribbon came later that evening after the talent show. Mistress and I decided to reprise my dance number from Camp, and although the space was a whole lot smaller than the basketball court, I managed to pull it off. It's amazing how it took no less energy to do it, though. This performance earned me a ribbon for tack and appointments.

Are you reading this, Buck?

Once the show was over and all the ribbons passed out, Stormy and I decided to go inside and curl up under a blanket - my first slice of heaven that weekend.

That was a good thing because the remainder of the weekend would be no holds barred, all out competition that would go pretty much non-stop from mid-morning until sundown and beyond. Rather than pick and choose events and run the risk of looking a tad elitist, Mistress, Stormy and I decided to have at it and toss our hats in for every event we could. That's not an easy thing to do when you're my age, but why not see how far I could go?

I would find out, too.

The opening ceremony took place at the start of events on Friday morning. We did our dressage number to The Yellow Rose of Texas, which proved a crowd pleaser. After a few speeches and the introduction of the guest of honor for the weekend, the games got underway.

I have to say I surprised myself. The roster of stallions competing this weekend was impressive as was the list of fillies. Everyone was out to have a good time more than anything else, but ponies do like to shine and they love to please their trainers and owners. Mistress has one golden rule when competing. It doesn't matter one whit to Her if we win or lose a competition, but She does expect an all-out effort. Not finishing first is no disgrace if the game has been well played.

So it was with a desire to play well that I stood at the starting line in the Gauntlet. This was a race against the clock - as most events were. I had to pull Mistress in a cart along a very twisty course. Along the way, She had to complete a number of tasks. First was putting a lance through a ring, the next was opening and closing gates while I waited, third was directing me through a slolem of hay bales, fourth was bandaging my leg, fifth was taking an egg on a spoon and driving the cart without dropping it, and the final task was to put me in the horse trailer.

Now I was going to find out if all of that time in the gym had been worth it. We were given the signal to go and Mistress reined me into action. To say that we played hard might be an understatement. I held back when told to, and galloped at full tilt the rest of the time. No eggs gor dropped and no hay bales were struck (as far as I know). When the time came for me to be put in the horse trailer, though, my long reins got fouled up around Mistress' leg and I went head over backside onto the floor of the trailer. That event - the first of them all - left me with a bleeding mouth from my bit and a skinned knee from the fall.

Yeehaa! Let the games begin!

A little patch-up work and a new pair of tights later, I was ready to go again. By that time, one other pony had taken a spill and joined me in the infirmary. Clearly, the stallions in this bunch meant business!

My efforts and bruises were worth it, though. I took Reserve Champion in the Gauntlet, surprising the daylights out of me. The Champion of the event was a pony named Clover whom nobody was going to catch. He beat my time by a full 20 seconds.

The Stallion Power Challenge was the next event for me. In this, ponies had to drag a large timber for a specified distance and then sprint to the finish line. Like the Gauntlet, it was a race against the clock. Being as fearless as Mistress desires, I stepped up to the starting line and took the harness. I was happy with my performance and took fourth place, which wasn't bad in a large field.

Other competitions included Hunter Jumper - both beginner and advanced, Dressage - beginner and advanced in both formal and freestyle events, Conformation, and the blindfolded cart challenge. The only event we didn't take part in was the Fox Hunt. I don't recall exactly why, but events conspired to keep that one off the schedule for me.

Hunter Jumper was a jump course. If you have never seen one of those, or if you have seen them in an equestrian event, bear in mind that the course looks very different from the stands than it does on the ground. For all of me, it was a field of sticks that I had to navigate around and it made no sense. Some kind soul had gone to the trouble of painting lines ont he ground that we could follow. Then they allowed us to walk the course a couple of times just to get it clear. Finally, they gave us the option of trotting or cantering the course with the only stipulation that we could not change gait in mid-course. Further, if we chose to canter, we had to get our leads correct.

Well, correct lead has never been a problem for me when cantering, so I decided to go for it. I went through the beginner's course on the correct lead all the way through.

It would have helped if I had not missed the very first jump. Remember those lines they took all that trouble to paint?

Oh, the ignominy of it all.

Embarrassment out of the way, we moved on. Conformation is an event that has to do with how well ponies get along in a group. We were let into the ring and given commands by the ring steward. We would be judged on how well we obeyed the commands and the rules of etiquette in the ring. Yours truly missed one command - or rather, I missed one detail of that command. It was a detail that I would not have understood, so it makes no difference. And, of course, I know what it means now, so I'll never get it wrong again. I remember not hearing the command to stop at the end, but I didn't feel badly about that because Clover didn't hear it either. Both of us continued to canter around, almost dropping from exhaustion until someone stopped us and told us the event was over.

I took fifth place on that one. Ugh.

Dressage...now that was a different story. And I'll tell that one in the next installment along with the story of how I hit the wall.

Yes, it happens on occasion.

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